FAQs

The simplest way to tell if a therapist is “good“ is asking them questions that are relevant to you. You are the client and you get to decide if a therapist is right for you. However, below are some ways to delineate based on a number of factors: 1. As you first begin your search, pay attention to the acronyms or lack thereof at the end of each clinician's name. This will indicate their level of experience. If this is important to you, then look for a fully licensed clinician. These individuals will have a LCPC or LCSW license which means they have completed the state's required hours of training and passed a board certified test on mental health disorders. There are unlicensed clinicans who will be identifiable by a PCLC acronym or they will state they are pre-licensed. A Pre-licensed clinician is still earning their license with the state. This means they have less experience conducting clinical therapy with clients and often are still learning. It will often be people who are fresh out of graduate school. 2. When you've narrowed your interest in a therapist to 2-3 names it's time to reach out to the therapists. I recommend having a few questions prepared that are relevant to your situation to ask the therapist. The therapists should be able to answer your questions, as well as have specific training in the problems you seek to resolve. 3. The consult will be the biggest indicator of whether you think you will work well with the therapist. During the time you'll have a chance to get to know the therapist a bit more and ask those prepared questions. 4. Towards the end of the consult, the therapist should ask you if you feel comfortable and if you would like to set up an appointment. The therapist should always give you this as an option and explain that not all therapists will be a match with all clients. 5. If you do not feel comfortable with the therapist, the therapist should be able to refer you to another therapist within their network that they trust and are familiar with.

Trauma is a variety of experiences and will be different for each individual. A traumatic experience is something bad that has left a person feeling alone, fixated or avoidant of any reminders of the bad event. There is “big T” and “little t” trauma, but most people label their trauma as “bad experiences”. In this way people “other” or minimize their trauma to be more comfortable and manageable. This is because trauma feels like a large experience that happens to somebody else, but bad experiences happen to everyone. If you’ve found me then you already know that this is what I am an expert at working with. I resolve bad experiences with EMDR, which has a powerful transformative effect on a client’s neural pathways, emotions, and actions.

Trauma in children can look very different from trauma in adults. 1. Children struggle to regulate and cover up the feelings that they have in response to bad events. 2. Children can have nightmares, play out disturbing material at recess or at play dates, constantly talk about the bad event, look like they are spacing out or not paying attention or acting defiant. 3. Children that have endured a traumatic event can become developmentally clingy or overly distant from their caregiver. 4. Their personality may appear to change and they will have more impulsive behaviors and over the top reactions to previously normal events. 5. Teens will have these same internal reactions, but they tend to get a bad reputation for being the defiant ones or the ones that are always in trouble. When in reality, what is happening is that they cannot regulate their emotions due to traumatic or bad experiences. 6. Teens tend to self isolate, loose friends/change friendships, lose interest in previous enjoyed activities, distance themselves from family members or experiment with drinking or vaping. Examples of traumatic and bad experiences that lead to treatment are: divorce, abuse, bullying, medical trauma, car accident, a dog bite or attack, witnessing a loved one undergo a traumatic event, death of a loved one, witness of domestic violence, emotional or psychological abuse, and parents/or parent being overly reliant upon their child for their emotional needs. One of my specialties is relational trauma, which shows up in personal relationships, typically from family of origin attachment issues and, as a child matures into adulthood, it becomes obvious with their significant others or close friendships. Anxious children often look like they are “perfect”, they have perfectionist tendencies, they like to organize, they are people pleasers, and adults always compliment them. -- They tend to get comments about how “mature” they are. Over maturity in children is a classic symptom of a child struggling with anxiety and heightened self criticism with overly high self expectations. -- They are focused on not getting into trouble and are hyper alert to any perceived discipline or criticism. -- Anxious children can also look like they are ignoring you as they sit there and only blink, but do not do as you ask or do not fidget/move their bodies. These opposite ends of the spectrum are commonly mistaken for a well functioning child or a defiant child.

If children or teens are showing any of the symptoms of trauma that I outlined above, and it is impacting their daily life or beliefs about themselves, you should seek assistance from an experienced trauma therapist. Some signs are: -- A loved one, doctor or teacher will notice and comment or give feedback about a change in your child. -- Many times the school will call you with issues that are ongoing (this is not always the case such as with the “perfectionists”). -- If your teen or child asks you to find a therapist for them then this is a sign to listen to your child as they know that they need help.

The default therapist’s training is how to perform effective therapy with adults. A therapist that is trained to work with adults is specifically trained for the developmental needs of a brain that has already reached maturity. -- Doing effective therapy with children is a specific training program that a therapist must seek out and develop through their own interest. -- To become a competent and efficient expert in treating children and teens a therapist must pursue family and play experts in the field for mentoring, training and consultation. -- Oftentimes an adult can talk about their problems and logically come to conclusions, but a child does not talk about their problems. Children and tweens will often play out their traumas in the therapy room rather than directly confronting them through speech. -- For an adult, talk therapy and speaking about their traumas can be freeing and enlightening, but for a child it can be terrifying and re-traumatizing. -- A child or play therapist knows specific interventions and has practice in these child centered interventions, that directly target symptoms or coping skills for children to practice and learn that should utilize play, games, sand tray, crafts and movement.